Chapter 24

“Wow, so you are human. I thought you weren’t because You were only looking ahead and caring about your success.”

“… … .”

“If you’re going to be like that, why don’t you just grab the chance now?” Jaewon said in a completely relaxed voice.

“I can’t .” Taewan’s voice sank low.

“Why? If you want it desperately, you’ll have to catch it.”

“I wonder how long it would have been until she said that. I have never met someone who said such words easily.”

“… … .”

“I really want to break up, she said that.” The focus has returned to Tae-wan’s eyes.

They have be together for over 10 years. Now they were closer than ‘family’ but they were

‘lovers’….

When they were alone , they filled each other with warmth as if it was their own. It was clear what kind of worries Hayeon would have had.

He imagined what she had felt while packing his luggage. Choosing the right words , how her heart would have broken countless times throughout the choices. And after, she would have cried for days after her spoken word.

Tae-wan’s eyes darkened.

“I still don’t know why. Why did you to break up? I did my best. Caught up in this situation Oh, let’s see,I don’t think I have the confident to hear the words twice.”

A heavy voice fell through Tae-wan’s lips.

He couldn’t make many memories by going to many places like others. But he thought that he had loved enough. Did his best. So, he couldn’t figure out why their love should end like this.

By this point he couldn’t figure out what his heart was feeling. Was it right to break up with Ha-yeon? Is he in the process of accepting it or rejecting the break up?

“What do you mean you did your best?” Jaewon asked as he took out a new soju bottle from the refrigerator.

Tae-Wan was speechless for a moment at his sudden question. Then, after a while, he opened his mouth.

“It didn’t make me feel bad. I just didn’t want her family ignore her because she chose me.”

“… … .”

“I wanted to do my best to succeed. At least I hoped it wouldn’t be hard for her.”

“Is that what she wanted?”

When Tae-wan tried to answer, Jae-won cut him off,sweeping down his rough bearded chin.

“Can you be sure that the best you did was the best for her?”

Jaewon’s eyes sharpened.

When Tae-wan didn’t say anything, he continued.

“Maybe the best direction could have been wrong. The direction you put all your might in, actually, may have been a direction that didn’t reach her at all.”

“… … .”

“Uhhhh, I’m going to smoke today. I have to smoke because of you, boy.”

Jaewon took out a cigarette he had put in the cabinet and bit it in his mouth.

Fog-like smoke leaked from his parted lips.And for the first time, when he looked at Tae-wan who was sitting silently in front of him. He saw himself when he was younger. The two images overlapped, even though Tae-wan shared no similarities with him.

His lips moved arbitrarily.

“Is it because I overslept when I was younger?”

Jaewon crumpled a cigarette in an ashtray and glanced at Taewan.

At the unexpected words, Tae-wan looked up and looked at him one beat late.

“The most important preparation for that day was My backup. I held it in my hand and ran all the way to school. Luckily, I passed through the gates and  didn’t have to be punished. I thought I was successful. I wasn’t late, and it was in my hands. But everything  became twisted. My wallet and keys fell out of my pocket. On that day, it rained, l stood in front of the gate while being hit by the rain for several hours. At that time, I was shaking and I thought I would never make this mistake again. But I did it again.”

“… … .”

“I wanted to succeed, so I only looked ahead and ran, and I dropped my wife, daughter, and son from my pocket. I can’t go pick them up because I don’t know which street they’re on. Even if I knew , there’s no way someone else wouldn’t have picked up those precious thing.