Chapter 20

Hayeon raised the flowing scarf. Checking with the mobile phone app said that the last bus would arrive in 10 minutes. Ha-yeon rolled her feet, covering her face halfway through her shawl. It was quite cold at night. It felt colder because it was a stop with no people. Jiyoon came out of the bar and offered to take her. Hayeon refused the request. Jiyoon drank more alcohol than herself.She sighed, saying she was upset, and said,’Good. Let’s meet a good guy too. I’ll be stuck in the house forever, hiding that pretty face. Done! It’s good!’ Then, she said to see if she changed her mind while drinking another drink.

“No. Isn’t that too much for him? You ask me to break up? Wow, were you waiting? I really did it too much. I haven’t seen it that way.” The arrow of hate went to Kang Tae-wan.

Hayeon did this and then left Jiyoon, who ran wildly. Hayeon couldn’t get angry when Jiyoon ran wild. Ji-yoon, who emptied all of the soju bottles alone, was silent only after emptying the last glass. Then she looked at the table with a drunken face for a while and said.

“… I heard from somewhere, and love is a glass-like deal, Ha Yuna.”

“Why are you writing poems all of a sudden?” Hayeon smiled.

She thought that Jiyoon was emotionally spit out because she was drunk a lot. However, when Jiyoon raised her head, her eyes were clearer than expected. She was drinking, but she wasn’t in a state to say anything.

“I also shudder when I say this… . It’s because that’s the most suitable analogy. I have made more breakups and more love than you. That’s what I felt.”

“Why is it like glass?” Hayeon laughed at Jiyoon who was drunk.

After breaking up with Tae-wan, she laughed for the first time. Even though she knew it wasn’t in a situation to laugh, she couldn’t  not laugh.

“In order to function, I have to be constantly in control. It means it takes effort. But then, if it breaks, it’s over.” Hayeon nodded as if agreeing to Jiyoon’s words.

“The problem is that just because it breaks is not the end.”

“… … .”

“I cleaned it up hard, but the next day there was another piece of glass sticking out. Visible, stepped on by a foot, and then torn flesh… . After a few repetitions like that, when you think it’s over, you’ll find it again after a while. Again, that boring piece of glass.” Jiyoon was saying that the piece of glass would suddenly fall in the name of ‘memory’.

The smile gradually disappeared from Hayeon’s face.

“… It will hurt a lot more than you think, Ha Yuna.” The more memories you have, the longer your breakup will be. Hayeon couldn’t say anything to Jiyoon’s last notice. It was difficult just to keep her smile.

After that, they didn’t say anything until they emptied the remaining half bottle of soju and left the store.

Tiring. She picked up her phone at the text notification sound.

[I got home. You?] It was Jiyoon.

[I’m waiting for the bus.]

[Take a taxi.]

[I just like the bus.]

[Anyway, weird stubbornness. Go home and contact me.]

[Yes.] The message ended in no time.

Ha-yeon couldn’t put her cell phone in her pocket even though she knew there was no place to contact her anymore. She was waiting like it was a habit. Foolishly. She turned on the cell phone that she had been fiddling with for a while.

After searching through the phone storage list, she  found ‘he’. It was the name she decided after thinking because she couldn’t save it as a name or nickname in case someone would see it.

She wanted to both memorize the phone number and save it. Hayeon’s fingertips hovered in the air. She knew that the cell phone number left in her head couldn’t be erased when she deleted it, but she deleted it from her phone nonetheless.

She stared at the place where the number one disappeared. It was strange, as if half of the cell phone was empty. … I’m not going to contact you. She knew better than anyone that Tae-wan was exhausted. Maybe he was waiting for her to tell him this story.

“Sigh.” Hayeon raised her head and looked at the night sky.

The place where the full moon disappeared was replaced by streetlights.

“… 10 minutes is so long.” Hayeon mumbled in a small voice and closed her eyes. The wind blew in her  face.

“Because it’s cold, wear a scarf, Ha Yuna. You have a long neck, you will catch a cold. Even’t if it’s okay, i will go. If you catch a cold, pass it to me, and you’ll be better.”The voice that suddenly came to mind, but she endured with a tight bite of her lower lip.

* * *

Ha Yeon looked at the winter sky over the wide open porch door. It was a clean sky without a single cloud. While the movers were busy moving, Ha-yeon stopped by to check if there was any luggage missing and then stopped on the veranda. It was Hayeon’s next favorite place in this house after the living room. When she opened the veranda door wide, the blue sky was the first thing she noticed even though it was a low level. The corners of the veranda were well covered, so even if she piled up a lot of unnecessary luggage, it was good that she couldn’t see it. Hayeon looked around the veranda quietly. When she first came in, it was a clean house, but when she removed her luggage, unexpected dust came into her  eyes. It was her second year in this house, so it was worth it.

“The next house we  move to will be  when we are  newlyweds.” Two years ago, on the day of the move, Tae-wan said so, hugging her from behind, admiring the spacious veranda. He hugged her all over his body and smelled the same body cleanser as himself.

“Huh. That would be great.” At that time, she knew it would be so without any doubt. Where did you and I go after waiting for the next time? A lonely wind passed over Hayeon’s eyes.

“Did you check it all?” Asked the moving center uncle who had all the luggage removed. Hayeon turned and nodded.

“Yeah.”

“Then Let’s go.” Hayeon first opened the door and then paused while walking behind the uncle of the moving center. Without the luggage, the house was empty and unfamiliar. Hayeon looked at the house and turned around.

“The next house we move to will be when we are newlyweds.” Tae-Wan’s voice was carried over by the blowing wind. Ha-yeon, paused for a moment, closed the door pretending not to hear. Jiyoon was right. The more memories there were, the longer the breakup was